Have you ever heard the cliché, “Cancer was the best thing to happen to me”? If you have been following my blog for a bit, you will have heard some variation of this over the past year. You must think the person is crazy to be uttering such a statement. Don’t worry its okay to admit J
Before I got sick I thought the whole “Cancer was the best thing to happen to me” was just a crock of shit. I mean how could it be? You are told you might die; then you go through treatment more akin to torture than treatment, which in the end might not even work. And if it does work, you can look forward to living with the fear of the cancer coming back at sometime. I used to think “you tell me how that can be the best thing to happen to you, because I am sitting pretty over here.”
Well we all know what happened since, I got leukemia, went through the treatments that thankfully worked and am now recovering. In addition, over the past year I was converted to one of the “crazies” who thinks Cancer is one of the best things that could happen to me.
The funny thing is that, although I have felt this way for past year if you were to actually ask me why it was one of the best things to happen to me, I actually wouldn’t have been able to answer you. Sure I would have told you that it had caused me to re-examine my life, weigh what is truly important to me, and helped me build character. But that is just a cliché answer to a cliché question.
I say that because anyone can make those changes, you definitely don’t need cancer to be able to do it. Therefore, there has to be something more. It must change people on a deeper level, a level not readily available to everyone. I can’t speak for other cancer patients because everyone’s experience is completely different; let alone their disease, so I will only comment on my own circumstances.
It wasn’t until I was leaving the hospital from my check-up this past week when the light bulb finally went off and I understood the root of why Leukemia became one of the best things to happen to me. After my appointment with the doctor, I visited with a gentleman named Keith, who is going through his transplant currently. We were discussing everything to do with the transplant and I was giving him some tips to help with the side effects. We ended up chatting for about 45 minutes, but there was one specific topic that stuck with me as I left.
We were discussing the transplant, and got onto the topic of just how brutal the treatment truly is. We were discussing how they literally bring to the brink of being dead and then bring you back again. I always knew how brutal the Leukemia treatment protocol was but to actually verbalize it and realize they are basically killing the patient by bringing them right to the brink and then bringing them back from the dead brought a sobering and humbling feeling to whole experience.
We often talk about how things in this world always happen for a reason. Well this was one of those days for me. After visiting with Keith, I went to get my prescriptions from the pharmacy before leaving the hospital. As I was leaving the pharmacy I was still reflecting on our discussion when I just happened to look up at the quote board. Each day PMH has a new inspirational quote wrote on a white board in their hallway. Most days I walk by without looking but this day I decided to look up as I walked by. The quote for the day came from Dorothy Thompsom and it read:
"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live" |
It was almost a chilling experience when I read it. At that instant the light-bulb went off and I finally understood the root of why Leukemia was one of the best things to happen to me. Leukemia and the treatment had forced me to stare death in the face; in fact, twice! I was no longer afraid of it. This lack of fear has enabled me to focus more on other things in my life, begin to truly appreciate the gifts it offers, and enjoy all the aspects of living.
I would love to hear your thoughts on my reflection and I hope it maybe helped shed some light onto that common Cancer Cliché.
As always the photo still needs a title so don’t forget your suggestions!
No comments:
Post a Comment