Don't Worry it is Okay to be Petrified

You just found out you have cancer, don't worry you are allowed to be petrified.  It is not often you hear the news that you have an illness you may not survive.  Although this is a frightening time, you have to spend the time accepting and embracing your fears.  Remember you are allowed to be petrified, this is a scary time.  I write this because I don't think someone going through a challenged of this magnitude can actually move forward, grow, and learn from this experience if they don't take the time to deal with these initial feelings. 

Unfortunately you will have to do a lot of this on your own (don't worry I have some tips :)).  Your new reality is a very hard time for your support network too and they will have a hard time truly understanding your feelings.  In addition, they will work extremely hard to keep your spirits up and keep positive.  Now don't get me wrong, being positive and upbeat is crucial, but you also need time to be petrified.

You need to go into this journey with a strong fighting spirit, and the strength your support network provides is invaluable.  Many people always say how positive and strong I am but this is because I took the time to work through my initial feelings and I have such an amazing support network that props me up anytime I get beaten down or need to draw on their strength. 

In taking the time to deal with your feelings, I can't say how long it will take because everyone is different, I can only speak from personal experience.  In my moments of solitude and quiet in the first few days (which wasn't many ;)) I took the time to have some good cries and just allow myself to be petrified and scared. This releasing of pent-up emotion was like re-charging the batteries and I always came out of it with readiness to continue my fight. 

The other amazing technique is journaling.  It is an excellent way to have a one way conversation and just become immersed in your own thoughts and emotions.  You can say whatever you want to yourself, and it is amazingly therapeutic.  This is actually the origins of this blog.  I decided these written thoughts may add some insight or help others so I decided to share them in the form of a blog.  

The final technique I used was to read about others who went through similar circumstances.   When I was first diagnosed my godsend was Lance Armstrong's book, it’s not about the Bike.  It made me realise all the emotions I was going through, he also went through, as well as thousands of other cancer patients as well. This really helped me understand it was normal to have these fears and allowed me to accept the fear and ultimately embrace it.  Without embracing your fear, you can’t embrace your inner fighter to battle the cancer.

Remember this is a scary, you are allowed to be petrified.  Don’t your fear to completely take over at any one time, instead give it different forms of release.  This is will allow you to accept it and embrace your new reality so that your inner fighting spirit can begin to build and ready itself to defeat your new foe.

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